Friday, August 15, 2008

weary and heavy laden

i feel this way this morning.

i have been pursuing Gods voice. i have been praying for a silence and peace of my heart so that i will be able to hear when His voice comes. i want to KNOW what He sounds like. i want the confedence that the Holy Spirit has to offer.

during prayer is such a difficult time to be still and listen and wait. especially since starting this pursuit. i began, and my heart was so burdened for susette i was praying for her and almost nothing else (other than my usual remorseful cry over my own sins). this week has been very ruff... as soon as susette was home and better. a friend was in an accident. james. but i saw Gods protection and provision for him. he walked away with just a bruise and a realization of how many people he has in his life that care for him. i was told of a grave sin of my great uncle. jack. he is in prison. my mom asked me to pray. but i think he will be just fine. he confessed his sin and now is paying the consequences. my aunt needs the prayer more. our life group wants to be a place where people can open up and be real. why dont i feel like i can do that? then my gramsie calls me. she has been diagnosed with lymphoma. my instant reaction was to encourage her with susettes success story. she asked me to send prayers her way. i said i would. she lives in australia. i hope to see her before she returns home. and lucas.

as i was praying this morning i couldnt even get to all of this because of the remorse of my own sin. an hour later i was drawn back to prayer. a scripture came to mind...

Matt 11:28-30

come to Me all who are weary and heavy laden and I will give you rest. take my yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. for My yoke is easy and My burden is light.

Thursday, August 14, 2008

susette

she is recovering quickly thanks to God's grace and our prayers!! she ate a cheese enchilada yesterday!

Jesus loves this girl so much!!

you can read her updates here: www.susetteupdate.blogspot.com

Tuesday, August 12, 2008

six months

we didn't even realize it had been six months. we had just spent the weekend in san diego. friday was cristina and asa's wedding. saturday we spent with a couple married couple friends. sunday our haiti team got together for a bbq. but mid-kiss on our couch back at home is when it dawned on me. somehow. six months had gone by? crazy.

significant days are just like any other days. we just choose to celebrate and remember things on certain days. birthdays, wedding days, deathdays, and days we are just thankful for something. that pretty much wraps up the significant days (let me know if im wrong). christmas, easter, thanksgiving, your birthday, the anniversary of a loved ones death, a six month anniversary, a baptism, fourth of july, memorial day, mothers day. the days themselves are not special for any other reason than God allowed the sun to once again rise. what is special is the thing we celebrate. we take time out to say "hey this is important to me," "you are important to me."

somedays are easier to celebrate and remember than others. Lucas' brother died almost 5 years ago. in my experience i have never had to encounter a significant day i was not looking forward to. it is unfathomable to me and my heart is searching for the way to be what he needs right now.

Saturday, August 9, 2008

san diego

(this was an attempt to post from lucas' blaskberry. all that showed up was the title and the time. maybe next time ill get it)

Monday, August 4, 2008

a friend of mine has been sick

susette mannasero. i met her through my husband lucas. he met her years ago and is one of the first people to talk to him about Jesus. in 2004 she and her family sold everything they had and moved to haiti to begin an orphanage. christmas eve of 2007 susette was diagnosed with cancer. hodgkin's lymphoma. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hodgkin's_lymphoma
so she has been back in the states for testing and treatments. late jan she was tested and the results were cancer free!! an incredible testimony of Jesus' ability to heal still today! however, they were asvised to still go through the chemotherapy treatments. 6 months of chemo went by quite smoothy compared to many that go through this. i attribute this not only to the personal strength of this woman, but also her spiritual strenth, and the grace of God. you can read her update blog here: susetteupdate.blogspot.com
on the home stretch now susette has been going through radiology treatments. unlike chemo... these are daily. 7 days straight. one day of rest. and another 7 days. after the first 7 days she was having incredible pain while trying to swallow food, and then even water. it took two hours for a piece of quich lodged in her contristed throat to make its way down her esophogus. apparently, the radiology treatments had caused great damage to her esophogus. she couldnt eat for the next 7 days, and when they attempted to put a tube down her throat, they found it was bleeding. her blog asked us to pray.

i found myself this past week having susette so deaply laid on my heart. i dont think i have ever prayed for something so urgently. (except maybe for guidence about marrying lucas). as each day passed i was praying more urgently. sunday (yesterday) was a day of decision. they would try the food tube again, if that did not work... she would have to have a PICC (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Peripherally_inserted_central_catheter) inserted until her esophogus healed enough to eat. sunday i attended my church's service on the beach. the message was on soul food. the pastor used the same theme scriputures and worship songs that have been on my heart for susette.

Matt 11:28-30
Come to me, all who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.

John 6:35
Then Jesus declaired, "I am the bread of life. He who comes to me will never go hungry, and he who believes in me will never be thristy.

ALL WHO ARE THIRSTY
all who are thristy
all who are weak
come to the Fountain
dip you heart in the stream of life
let the pain and the sorrow
be washed away
in the waves of His mercy
as deep cries out to deep

come Lord Jesus come
come Lord Jesus come
come Lord Jesus come
come Lord Jesus come

this somg, i believe, is from Isaiah 55. the whole chapter is really incredible. here is another song from the same portion of scripture:

COME TO THE RIVER
im waiting here for You
listening for Your voice
speak Your Word over me
and my soul will live

great are your mercies Lord
renewed for me everyday
you faithfully pardon me
i hear You say

come to the water
come to the river
come to the well
come if youre thristy
come if your broken
come and be healed

as sure as the rain comes down
as sure as the snow alls from heaven
Your promises are fullfilled
i hear You say

come and drink from the Saviors cup
come and be cleansed by the Saviors blood

i will go out with joy
i will go out with peace
the mountains and hills sing praise
and i hear You say

so... the news is: yesterday she was able to swallow some ice cream and jello! Praise Jesus! however she was unable to drink the protien drink, ensure, and she will have the PICC until she is able to eat/drink something more nutritous.

please pray for her. she is the mother of 53.